I realized in 2008 that I was here in this life to be an energy healer. I learned that it was okay that I was a speech pathologist for 23 years first, that the life experience that went with that would be valuable for my career as an energy healer. I have found that to be true too. My life experience and my training have merged very nicely in giving me the tools I need to support my clients.
Where I struggled, though, was that there was this notion that I should write blogs or write a book and in the beginning that was so new and wonderful. I had just myself been opened up to the wonderful and exciting expansiveness so of course I should write about it and tell the world right? But then I got stuck in, “what could I teach?” there are countless people out there already teaching, “what could I possibly have to say that hasn’t already been said”. And, “why do I think people would want to hear it from me?”. So for more years than I want to admit I remained silent. I was paralyzed by fear and shame.
Dr. Brene Brown wrote a book titled: I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Telling the Truth About Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power. In her book, she defines shame as “an intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging. Women often experience shame when they are entangled in a web of layered, conflicting and competing social-community expectations. Shame creates feeling of fear, blame, and disconnection.”
I feel that in the ‘waking up’ that so many of us are doing now, especially women, that we are reaching out more. We are starting to realize that the isolation, or better yet, the insulation we have put ourselves in has only served to disconnect us. I realize now that it is not about teaching, this writing a blog or a book, it’s about connecting. My story and my insights are just that, mine. They may or may not have an impact on anyone else. Maybe one blog entry speaks volumes to you and the next one not at all. It’s the reaching out that counts. It’s the “here’s the way I feel it and see it – how about you?” that really counts.